Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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