Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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