is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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