HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
