I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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