Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize