Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize