How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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