lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Randomize
