i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
