i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
