If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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