yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Randomize
