We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
