but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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