do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
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