maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
