the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
