so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
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