so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize