do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Randomize
