i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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