I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
