Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
there is another microwave in the elevator.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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