Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize