I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
