Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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