I like to think it a success when the cops are called
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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