I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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