dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Randomize
