i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
