why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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