k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
