Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
