I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
whose parrot is this?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
You were trust falling into bushes
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
