Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
