I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize