this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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