Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
