Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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