Will you blow on my dice?
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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