No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
