Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
