I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
No stitches, just platelets and will power
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
