You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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