Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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