Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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