i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize