I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
