You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
It's rum buckets o'clock
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
